Hi Rosie,

We just wanted to send an email to let you know that Bowie Duane has arrived and we are so in love. Thank you for all of your help in the hypnobirthing course. We learnt so much and it especially helped Jordan to prepare for our home birth. He was amazing. He was so calm, never showed any fear and knew exactly how to support me. 

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My birth story:

On the 19th July at 39+2 I noticed some stronger braxton hicks in the morning. I felt really emotional and had a little cry with Jordan as well, not particularly about anything! My body was clearing out and I was thinking could this be my body preparing? But I also knew that this could happen over days or weeks so didn’t get my hopes up too much. The braxton hicks fizzled out that afternoon and I did all of my usual things to support my body by walking the dog, drinking raspberry leaf tea, bouncing on my birth ball, using visualisations and most importantly relaxing and accepting that my body knows what to do and when to birth my baby. As I was getting ready for bed that night I lost my mucous plug! Again, I didn’t get my hopes up because I knew this could still mean I had days or weeks ahead of me. 

On the 20th of July at 39+3 I was woken with contractions at 4.30am. I took some paracetamol, heated up my heat pack and tried to go back to bed but I could not get comfortable. I needed to move through these contractions and laying down was making them worse. I got up and thought it’d be best to let Jordan sleep for a bit longer in case we were in for a long night and I woke my mum who was staying with us as she travelled from Adelaide before lockdown to be here for the birth! She was a good distraction for a couple of hours, we watched tv shows and got excited about the fact the baby might be joining us soon!

I didn’t get a gradual build up to my contractions. They were coming every 5 minutes and it seemed that each one was more intense than the last. This made it difficult to find a rhythm with my body and find what works. I moved around and used my heat pack for a while and then I moved to the TENS machine. It was around 7.30am and I had woken Jordan up at this point as I was finding I was getting really emotional and needed the extra support. I used the TENS for an hour but my heart was longing for water so I moved into the shower. Jordan and my mum were amazing at supporting me. Jordan kept the bathroom dark and moved the diffuser there for a little light and I moaned through each contraction. I started to get overwhelmed around 9.30am as they were becoming intense so we called the midwife for an early labour assessment. She arrived at 10am, I agreed to a vaginal exam and I was found to be 3cm dilated with baby in a great position and low in the pelvis.

​Thank you so much Rosie. I 100% owe you and the hypnobirthing course for Jordan’s preparedness and calmness. I wouldn’t of been able to do it without him and he tells me the course gave him so much knowledge on physiological birth and how to support this that he knew my body was doing just what it needed to do and this wasn’t something to be afraid of! 

We are absolutely in love with our little Bowie Duane, all 2.9kg of him! 

Thank you,

Chloe & Jordan :)

Prior to having a baby I was PETRIFIED of birth and while pregnant with Lorelai it made me sick to my stomach to think about how I was going to give birth. I went along to the hospital run birth preparation classes and went home crying after almost every session. However during the pain relief session the midwife mentioned Hypnobirthing and I was immediately intrigued. Having a pit in my stomach about the hospital options for pain relief I knew I had to find another way so I went home and researched this hypnobirthing thing and found Rosie.

When meeting Rosie I immediately felt at ease and felt as if she genuinely wanted to help me. By the lunch break of the first day I was excited and looking forward to my birth and by the end of the two day (spread over a week) I felt empowered, excited and calm about my birth. I felt as though I had a greater understanding of my body, tools to help me through my labour and a real  partnership with my husband about delivering our baby girl.

I had hoped for a water birth with no intervention but unfortunately I was required to be induced due to hypertension and low fluid around bubs. So as Hypnobirthing teaches I surrendered to whatever turn my birthing took and I prepared myself for the induction.

I had the catheter balloon put in the night before and the morning of Lorelai's birth had my waters broken and the syntocinon drop started just before 10am and less than 7 hours later my beautiful baby girl was born. I had a calm, positive and unaided natural birth with less than 4 hours of active labour. I cannot thank Rosie and Hypnobirthing Australia enough for the amazing program that absolutely transformed my fear to faith, giving me the most incredible respect and understanding of my body and allowing me to have such an incredible and positive first birth experience.

Caitie, Nick and Lorelai

​Hi Rosie,

How are you? We have been super busy as you can imagine with welcoming our beautiful baby boy, Fionn (pronounced Finn) Anthony, who arrived on September the 20th at 9.35pm. Fionn is a rare boy already, being among the small percentage of babes who arrive on their estimated due date! This was unfortunately due to having to be induced, as the fluid around him was really low and although we advocated to stay at home for an extra few days, sniffing clary sage, walking constantly, getting our lovely midwife to do a stretch and sweep at home to move things along, drinking raspberry tea and lots of spinning babies moves to try and turn him as he was posterior- we had to be induced on the Friday as the risk was too high.

Both Jimmy and I are stoked to say that although things didn't play out as we expected, Hypnobirthing still saved the day! Most importantly, it gave us tools to use during birth and ensured that we, as a birthing team were really in sync throughout the whole process. Jimmy was the BEST birth partner, even the midwife said afterwards that she felt she had nothing to do until the big show at the end because Jimbo "had it covered". Such a show off! Although, the staff were incredible and had gotten to know us as a couple and knew we had done hypnobirthing, so really supported us to make informed choices, especially when navigating some of the more bureaucratic parts of the system. They were kind, caring and gave me the hard word when I needed to 'hold it together'!

Let's not stray from the true heroes of the story though, Fionn and my body working together to get the job done. Due to all the practice I had done with the affirmations and meditations, I was able to stay calm despite having to have continuous monitoring and being in hospital from start to finish, which was not part of my preferences or how I had imagined my birth going. Despite this, I overcame my fear, and we were able to set up the room how we wanted, with music, low lights, my clothes from home and we got really active, moving around, utilizing the props available (ball, yoga mat, shower, bed, windowsill etc) in the space and feeling confident to do so. We advocated to turn the beeping on the machine off, as it was anxiety provoking and Jim helped me navigate moving the IV drip around, so much so that I didn't even notice it was attached to me by the end!

The TENS machine was a life saver for the earlier part of birth, I had a lot of back ache so it was a great distraction and tool to use. However, I had to ditch it as baby had to have more monitoring (I guess that's how it goes.) I was able to overcome this by getting in the shower and using other positions and mainly my kick arse frame of mind, being able to breathe through surges, knowing they had a peak and then they would end, if only momentarily. I also hugely relied on Jimmy during this part for comfort and encouragement, I wouldn't even let him have a dinner break!

The birth was intense from the start, I feel like I didn't get a warm up but I think it was because my body and Fionn were ready, so the surges came hard and fast. It was physically and mentally exhausting but having Jimmy there and the midwives, and for the last part, my super mum, helped so much. I felt in unison with my body and Fionn and knew when my body was in transition as I felt Fionn turn to an anterior position and move down. The midwife thought I would be hours away, but I knew it was closer!

Then came the baring down, but I will call it pushing, because I got super active and pushed and pushed, with control and from deep within myself! It was awesome and like nothing I have ever experienced before and I made a sound I had never heard before! I had used gas a little bit up to this point, but the midwife told me to ditch it. The Doctor was there standing by to intervene in the last stage, but after about 40 minutes, she knew she didn't need to be there, I was going to do it. With Jimmy on one side and my Mum on the other, egging me on, I pushed my beautiful boy down the birthing canal and into the world! I knew the sensation of crowning, as a burning one or the 'ring of fire', so I knew the head was coming out. With the guidance of my midwife, I was able to exert control and push him out slowly to prevent a tear and with a 3.3kilo baby I don't know how it was intact, but it was!

I have an amazing photo our lovely student midwife took of the moment Fionn, Jim and I meet for the first time! It captures the emotion in so many ways that words cannot. I had a preference to try for a physiological third stage, but due to being induced already, I thought, what's another bit of syntocinon in my thigh to move things along. That came out nice and easy, not that I cared because I was already breastfeeding my son for the first time and having lots of skin to skin.

Thank you so so much for everything, everyone at the hospital in Warrnambool rave about the 'hypnobirthing' parents they get coming through, about how empowered they are and how they achieve a 'positive birth' experience due to the shifted state of mind and epic teamwork that comes from going through this journey together.

We are exhausted now, we were so focused on the birth that we almost forgot the (worthwhile) challenges that lay ahead on the other side! Breastfeeding is incredible but has been difficult so far and the lack of sleep is something else, but all is worth it for the little love of our lives!

Thanks again,
​
Love Jim, Hayley and Fionn

​​Wed 31st May: Our last day at home before we become parents…. Forever. The feeling that our lives are about to change in a way that we can only imagine. James finishing our birth plan, printing my affirmations, last minute cleaning and packing. Me making my birthing goddess necklace, feeling my women friends and family, generations of them holding me. Farmor’s ring on my finger, my maternal grandmother's watch ready for my birthing alter; the heavy, fossil crystal from Kate, affirmations and crystals from Manjit, photos and letters…my holding circle was solid. Feeling strong, a bubbling mix of anxiety and excitement. The unknown…. Knowing that anything could go down, and feeling ready for whatever cards Mama deals me. There’s nothing more we could do now; no need to paint the cot, what we were about to do was way bigger than that. It’s time, I’m ready… let's do this thing, our baby is coming!!

 
Left the house, had one last acupuncture in Newtown- open cervix, down baby… we’re ready; we can do it. Lunch on pako; James and I feeling relaxed; aligned, ready. Stopped at Kates for a little yoga pep talk circle with her and Ari; last minute reminders for both James and I…a beautiful Shakti mantra sung by Kate; energetic high fives; headed to the hospital with so much juice in our tanks, armed with all of the physical and energetic tools we could muster. Got to our room;  checks, monitor on Marley’s heart rate; always makes me anxious- Marley not moving much… noticing my heart beat faster and breath become shallow, but knowing, trusting we are in the right place. Rosie arrives; beautiful breath of fresh air and smiling positivity… All is well. So many midwives and doctors breezing in and out. Almost time for the balloon; I need to poo! This could be my  last chance! Rosie bought me 15 mins, left the room so I could relax enough to relinquish my bowels; success. Lay down, doctors arrive; lay back, legs in stirrups, don’t know how many people peering down my most intimate entry point with bright lights shining down on her; about to become a birthing canal for the first time. Me surrendering to the process; this is our choice, we are doing this for the safety of our baby. But severing any feeling association I may have developed to my cervix; I cant feel this… I’ll just be strong and make jokes about it… I’ll look the doctors in the eye; I’m not scared. Any pain is part of my marination for the birth. I got this. James by my side, sure and strong, steady and present, as always at these times. 
……continued… from memory

They are ready to poke and prod; I ask them to wait, till I give them permission to enter with their cold, sterile tools. Deep breath, ok; now you may enter. Doing my best to hold onto my empowerment, my dignity. They check my cervix, 1cm dilated already, impressive, all that acupuncture must have worked! Now for the balloon…It’s cold, it’s mildly painful, they inflate the balloon with water, I’m not really present. Just squeezing James’ hand. They remove the tools, tell me I did such a good job, like a good girl I suppose… toughened up, didn’t make a sound, didn’t make a fuss. They offer pain medication, I don’t need it.. Rosie gives a final embrace, her big smile and advice to get a good nights sleep, take the pain medication if you need it.. you need sleep! James stays with me, we talk, I sway, still monitoring the heart rate; They want to know the balloon isn’t effecting the baby. We eat some dinner (?).. James says goodbye. It’s just me, on a plastic coated bed, with the painful moans of birthing women next door to put me to sleep. I put my headphones in, music usually helps. The bed is cold and uncomfortable, the pain is getting worse; I can't sleep, it’s nearing midnight and I still haven’t slept… Rosie’s words help me to surrender to the pain medication, sleep is a priority; they bring me something and I drift into a deep sleep, only to be woken at 6am to be told I need to get the IV cannula in my arm… hmm, ok, I’m too sleepy and submissive to protest. It goes in at 6.15am. The room is freezing cold and I’m shivering. James hasn’t arrived yet and a young female doctor walks in and tells me we need to start the induction drip before 8am, and it’s time to break my waters. I don’t want to birth in this room, it doesn’t feel right, and it’s so cold, there’s no way I can relax. It’s already moving too fast for me, this doctor is pushing the fear card…. ‘we need to get this moving, your baby is at risk if we wait too long’… I let her speak but I did not let her fear permeate my being, James arrives. We ask to move rooms, they don’t listen, it registers of no importance compared to hospital timeframes and agendas.  It’s time to break my waters.. the young female doctor gloves up and gets to business, sometime after 7am.. she takes out the balloon and checks the dilation, 4cm..apparently very impressive. And soft, my cervix is soft, so soft the doctor with spindly arms and tiny hands is doing her best to get a handle on her with the little hook and becoming increasingly frustrated; she’s using all her might, her arm starts shaking; after what felt like at least 10 mins of trying, I ask ‘does it usually take this long? ‘Your cervix is very floppy’ she replies… floppy hey? Nobody calls my cervix floppy… ‘slippery perhaps?’ I offer ‘well, I haven’t yet emptied by bladder this morning, so I could do that, and then we could try the stirrups as well’ feeling the need to interrupt the unconscious assault on my poor cervix , and buying time to avoid the doctors impatience to start the drip. I get up, wee and get in the stirrups.. ok, now, on my watch lady… you may break my waters; done. Just in time for this weak wristed doctors end of shift, what a shame.. pressure off, dodged a bullet.

We get a midwife called (Andrea/ Ange, who starts her shift in tic toc robot mode, glances at our birth plan and has no interest in finding us another room… we start chatting, she warms up…. Maybe she can find us another room, with the wireless monitors too- miraculous! We are transferred to a room on the other side, it’s bigger, warmer and lights easily dimmed- this is where our baby will be born. Yes! We make it ours; salt lamp, oil diffuser, music, yoga props, affirmations on the walls… now we’re talking. Rosie arrives… always a breath of fresh air. Andrea loves our music, we get to know about her son, a musician.. we’re warming to each other. Rosie helps to stall the drip… we wanted a few hours post membrane rupture to find our flow and get things moving; Rosie makes sure we get at least this.. I start to find my flow, drop in, on the fitball.

​We’re all chatting, relaxed. Around 10am Andrea asks are you ready? Contractions haven’t started, can we begin the drip? I’m ready. It takes at least an hour before contractions start, some very mild tightenings, Andrea has a motherly hand on my belly asking if I can feel what’s showing up on the monitor- yes, just some a pleasant tightening sensations, I’m enjoying it. James opens the snacks which I was adamant were unnecessary, and I have some crackers and dip. This is fun, like our own little birthing party. The contractions begin to intensify, just a bit; Andrea finishes her shift.. feel like I’m saying goodbye to a friend. Then we get Sarah (with the help of Rosie’s behind the scenes wizardry)… and oh my, did we hit the jackpot. Sarah turns out to be like the midwife from the Red Tent… wise, experienced, strong, empowering and a passionate lover of normal birth. Thank yoouu! This is the woman who will be present to receive our baby, and ward off the fear mongering doctors.

Contractions keep intensifying, strong tightenings, my uterus working hard in response to the syntocinon… each contraction getting more painful, but I’m still on top of it, just managing to adjust to each rise in sensation, keeping my head above water, definitely intense, but manageable… needing James on my lower back doing the pressure points for every contraction now, and the heat pack, my noises are accompanying every contraction and getting louder. Fitball is good (?), then Sarah needs to do an internal- takes 3 contractions to get me on the bed. Her face says it all, I knew it wasn’t good news according to the hospital protocol checklist, but according to my body, I knew it was great news… the baby and I were doing this, and doing it well, I knew. “You’ve done some really good work, and the baby has moved down a lot” Sarah said in her encouraging, delightful British accent, “and I know the doctor said you were 4 cm dilated this morning, but now, you are only 3cm dilated”. I think she expected me to be deflated, but I felt in no way deflated.. I had a lot of juice in my tank, and I knew enough from Rhea Dempsey to know that dilation is not always a true indicator of birthing progress. I get off the bed and get back to work, staying with my body with each contraction; James there for every one. And managing to heat the heat pack and get icypoles in the interim. I have no awareness of what’s happening in the room; I’m going in.

​I find myself on the toilet; drip following. Sarah comes in ‘the doctors are happy with how you’re going, but they’d like to see some really good progress in the next hour. Are you happy for me to turn the drip up?’ ‘Yep’ I’m good, I got this. Drip goes up, the next contraction king hits me. It comes from nowhere and hijacks my entire body.. the pain takes my breath, blurs my vision and bowls me into a crisis of confidence. Fuck this, no way.. I’m out, where’s the caesarean. I try the sympathy card with James and in a voice laden with defeat, I manage ‘I can't do this babe’… he gives me a huge playful grin, and with full conviction replies, ‘yes you can’. Ok, the only way is through, fuck it, the next one is coming.. get back to work. IT takes full presence to stay with each contraction, and lots of vocalising... open the vocal cords, open the cervix. The rest in between is blissful… silent, peaceful respite from the intensity.. if Farmor can do it as a tiny 19yo birthing my dad in Copenhagen, then I can do it. I felt all the mothers before me; I harnessed that power. It wasn’t long before I felt the bum, YES! Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum! In the words of Rhea Dempsey. This baby is coming; that was so encouraging it gave me a second wind, and I knew I could keep going for much longer. I spy Rosie sitting casually on the perimeter of the room “I’m pushing’ I manage to say at the end of one contraction, not that I was really pushing, but the bowel pressure was intensifying. Rosie was completely unphased… apparently thinking I had much longer to go. I’m leaning on the bed; vaguely aware of some confusion about the heart rate monitor but not caring at all (turns out my heart rate was going down to 50 something in contractions and they were amazed)… Sarah suggests I get on the bed for some rest, she lies me on my left side, it helps to open the cervix apparently. The contractions slow down a bit, I get longer in that blissful place, and the contractions are different, the uterine pain is barely there, it’s just the bowel pressure, and that is primal and totally manageable. Now they believe me, the baby is coming. I hear them getting the trays and tools ready. Rosie keeps assuring me, your body knows what to do. At no point did they tell me to push; they said they would only do that if they were concerned about the heartbeat; I feel some impatience and push anyway.. it stings. I’m rushing, I kind of know I am, but I don’t stop it. I feel this beautiful weight coming into my vagina, I talk to the baby, ‘beautiful baby’ The head is coming, James is ready to receive our baby. My noises are primal. I think it took two contractions with pushing and our baby was here.

Ha I don’t even know where to start this!

So maybe I’ll just get right to the crux and chat to you about the good shit..

After a really long, mentally challenging wait for our little baby, I was induced 10 days over my due date. On Thursday 14th of June, after a week of heavy monitoring by my obstetricians and the Epworth Geelong Maternity team I was admitted and had a prostaglandin gel administered to get things going. After having lots of pre labour signs for the two weeks prior, my body was gagging to labour but was just struggling to get over the line. 

After the gel was administered and Ben was sent home, I got set up in my ridiculously massive room (one of the reasons people have nicknamed it ‘Hotel Epworth’) and put on one of my Hypnobirthing affirmation meditations to send me to sleep.

Ben and I had taken on the incredibly lovely Rosie from Geelong Born as our birth support who also runs the Geelong Born Hypnobirthing Australia™ course which we were always keen to do. So over two Sundays a couple months prior we learnt all about acupressure points and how breathing would help me through the labour. Having had my fair share of health stuff over the past couple of years and been pushed to the highest levels of my pain threshold, I knew where I could go in handling pain and knew that I could either freak the fuck out and let it go to my head or I could calm the hell down and breath through it and get it done. Anyway, more on that later.

After cramping pretty heavily all night I had one more CTG at dawn to check the baby was happy, which it was and then at 8am I had my membranes ruptured by my wonderful obgyn Dr Emily Huning. After a few cracks to burst them (they weren’t going to pop anytime soon given their thickness) I felt a strange release and a big gush of fluid. We were on our way!

Contractions started immediately but were super manageable, so I bounced happily on my favourite thing ever and the thing that got me through the pregnancy- the exercise ball! Chatting easily in between contractions I was then given Syntocinon via a drip to really get things going and BANG! It was all on. The contractions immediately went from zero to hero and I was deep into it. I spent the next hour bouncing on the ball or leaning forward onto the bed riding the waves, whilst breathing in my aromatherapy and having my pre made music playlists guiding me through.

After an hour and a half of this things started getting really serious and without anyone really knowing, I went through the transition phase. If you don’t know what this is, it’s just before you start pushing but you don’t realise and you are flat out trying to pack your bags to leave the hospital because you just don’t want to do it anymore. My reaction was to demand where I was at and how dilated I was. Because the baby was so far down and engaged it was really hard to monitor and her heart rate was so relaxed the nurses still thought I had some time to go. Nope, in my usual style.. my body was in no mood to dick around and just wanted to get things done! After an hour in transition of me kneeling over the ball on the floor, my body started to naturally push and I went with it.. 20 minutes later as my husband continued to rub my lower back as my only form of pain control and with the midwives were around the front of me trying to get the babies heart rate he was astounded to so quickly see the head crowing and just as he looked up to let the nurses know, by the time he looked back down- the baby was lying on the towel covered floor!

It all happened so quickly that no one was prepared for it and the baby and my body were so ready, out came a tiny little baby girl much to everyone’s surprise! As she was handed up to me I was in total shock.. what amazingness just happened??

Had I really just given birth to this vernix covered little ball of baby, in 3 hours, naturally with no drugs?? Yes I bloody did.

I don’t say this proudly as a boastful thing, as I know so many of my friends and other mummas have had really tough labours but I say this because I was genuinely so shocked at how much I loved the experience. Especially because the whole pregnancy I had been freaking out that I was having a caesarean after a medium had told me I was!! Note to all mediums- don’t tell mums to be they are having a caesarean!!! A sure as hell way to destroy their confidence!! But I was chuffed to have proved her wrong and to have had such a wonderful labour.

And I did with the help and support of my incredible man, who calmly and reassuringly supported me the entire time and Rosie, who was so gentle in her support. It was with her experienced guidance she was able to stop me getting into a higher state and allowed me to sink into myself and go deep with my experience. As she knelt in front of me and Ben behind, these two wonders kept me calm and empowered.

And the result of those incredible 3 hours was our little baby girl Adelaide Lily O’Connor, weighing 7.2pounds (what, me.. give birth to a small baby?!) and 47cm long with big feet like her mumma!

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I’ve really appreciated other mums who have reached out to check in to see how we are, particularly how I am. I guess they too understand how challenging and isolating this experience can be and women who stand strong for others when they stumble inspire me constantly. We have the power to change someone’s day so rather than beating them down with judgement or their own opinions on how something should be done, its been really lovely to see women simply offer support and a cooked dinner. 
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There is no one road, I’m learning that leads to success or a well raised, happy child. Everyone will find their own path and as rocky as it may be, its their path to walk. And how amazing the path I’m walking is and I cannot wait to lead Adelaide down it for a short while until she takes the reigns. I will empower her to see the world for the beauty and magnificence it has but most importantly showing her all the beauty and magnificence she holds within herself.

Hilary's birth story was first published on the Hilary Holmes Makeup blog page on August 7, 2018 

Hilary's birth resources...

​Rosie at Geelong Born www.geelongborn.com.au for birth support & the Hypnobirthing Australia™ course in Geelong & the Surf Coast.